Isaiah 38:1-6
HE is great. (<--- understatement)
I don't really even know what to do with these verses after I read them. It is like a douse of cold water in the morning; a wake up call to the weak prayers that I had hoped to keep hidden.
(Confession/) I don't really know how to pray with confidence that my prayers will be answered. (/End Confession)
Does that sound weird to you? In a way, I hope it does - at least then it would mean you don't struggle with faith in God like I do.
I think if someone came and told me that God told them that I was dying... I'd be like "Ok, I guess that's what the Big One wants." (After questions, tears, and good-byes... of course). I just don't think I would ever have the confidence to stick my little-Rachel-foot in the door and say "Hey God, what do You say (because of my great service to you) we even things up a bit and you tack on a few more years?!"
I think if someone came and told me that God told them that I was dying... I'd be like "Ok, I guess that's what the Big One wants." (After questions, tears, and good-byes... of course). I just don't think I would ever have the confidence to stick my little-Rachel-foot in the door and say "Hey God, what do You say (because of my great service to you) we even things up a bit and you tack on a few more years?!"
No. It just wouldn't happen. I wouldn't do it in a life or death situation and, to be honest, I don't know what situation I WOULD do it in.
I think if prayer were salsa, I'd be mild. I have the passion and the heart... but I don't have the boldness or the confidence before God to really get things kickin. My prayers end with dot dot dots (. . . ) and question marks (??) - rather than with exclamation marks (!!) or even a combination of the three (. . ?!).
On the same subject (but a completely different note) . . .
I was quite intrigued by how much you can learn about God's character by reading about how He deals with, acts toward and responds to His people throughout history.
I sometimes (<---understatement #2) stumble across verses or passages in the Old Testament where I feel so confused about what God did and why . . . I feel so far from understanding His ways or even the contexts and situations in which He was dealing with people in the Bible.
I sometimes (<---understatement #2) stumble across verses or passages in the Old Testament where I feel so confused about what God did and why . . . I feel so far from understanding His ways or even the contexts and situations in which He was dealing with people in the Bible.
In short... Just another day in realizing that in this whole journey of faith, I'm just a beginner.
And here are a few pictures of the happenings of my life lately...
Matisyahu concert : )
(An excellent night!)
Jermaine and his birthday cake (hand-picked by Grant and me)
Grant and an imitation of Heaven's bakery
Our new jet-ski! (The old one conked. . .)
A beautiful morning treat from God. Sunrise at the cabin over the 4th of July weekend! (Excellent weekend!!)
And here are a few pictures of the happenings of my life lately...
Matisyahu concert : )
(An excellent night!)
Jermaine and his birthday cake (hand-picked by Grant and me)
Grant and an imitation of Heaven's bakery
Our new jet-ski! (The old one conked. . .)
A beautiful morning treat from God. Sunrise at the cabin over the 4th of July weekend! (Excellent weekend!!)
What a great post to read. I always love them and I think you should write more of them!
ReplyDeleteRach, that's not weird at all.. I am about as shy as a nerd on the first day of school when it comes to being bold in my prayers. I'd have to confess that I pray very little, if ever, with an sort of ! unless I am excited. I SOOO too would just accept if someone told me the Big Man had one day left planned for me. When I "ask" for things, it's not that I doubt they'll happen but it's as though I am ok (or have to be okay) with it not happening, so it's more or less a suggestion. I just feel like, he already has it planned out so I'll just softly toss it up there so he knows it's on my mind, but I'll never throw a hard ball and !speak boldy! ...this is quite a thing to think about really. I love it.
The analogy was amazing.. I'd have to jump into your mild mix as well!